| what does normal look like? |
[Oct. 3rd, 2006|10:29 am] |
yesterday i prepared a worksheet for my high school students. we were doing the general sexual anatomy (which ducky doolittle refers to as "pleasure anatomy" in sex with the lights on) lesson and i wanted something to compliment the illustrations.
i was so pleased when i stumbled upon the soft hard gallery http://www.erectionphotos.com/softHardGallery/SoftHardGalleryP01.htm
i used many of the soft images to build a collage for my students. I also used images from the-clitoris.com's The Vulva Revealed gallery http://www.the-clitoris.com/n_html/n_v_image1.htm.
so i made a worksheet with ten penises and 8 vulvas (because the vulva pictures were larger and of better quality) and in the middle had the words "what does normal look like?"
i passed around the worksheet to my 11th and 12th graders, letting them know the images were graphic and they were free to decline to look at them. i asked the question "which one is the normal one?" they each voiced differing opinions, tending to choose the straighter circumcised penises or the more symetrical vulvas. then i popped the mind-blowing statement:
"they're all normal."
the reaction were immediate. " but miss, what's wrong with this one?" or that one or why are here lips so large or why is his head so small. The answer: "there is nothing wrong with any of these. they are all normal healthy vulvas and penises."
it blew their minds.
no pun intended. |
|
|
| CDC recommends HIV testing for most Americans |
[Sep. 21st, 2006|02:18 pm] |
from http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14938109/
AP, ATLANTA - All Americans between the ages of 13 and 64 should be routinely tested for HIV to help catch infections earlier and stop the spread of the deadly virus, federal health recommendations announced Thursday say.
The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said HIV testing should become about as common as a cholesterol check. Nearly half of new HIV infections are discovered when doctors are trying to diagnose a sick patient who has come for care, CDC officials said.
“We know that many HIV infected people seek health care and they don’t get tested. And many people are not diagnosed until late in the course of their illness, when they’re already sick with HIV-related conditions,” said Dr. Timothy Mastro, acting director of the CDC’s division of HIV/AIDS prevention.
“By identifying people earlier through a screening program, we’ll allow them to access life-extending therapy, and also through prevention services, learn how to avoid transmitting HIV infection to others,” he said.
The announcement was hailed by some HIV patient advocates and health policy experts. They said the guidelines could help end the stigma of HIV testing and lead to needed care for an estimated 250,000 Americans who don’t yet know they have the disease.
“I think it’s an incredible advance. I think it’s courageous on the part of the CDC,” said A. David Paltiel, a health policy expert at the Yale University School of Medicine.
The recommendations aren’t legally binding, but they influence what doctors do and what health insurance programs cover.
Some physicians groups predict the recommendations will be challenging to implement, involving new expenditures of money and time for testing, counseling and revising consent procedures.
Some physicians also question whether there is enough evidence to expand testing beyond high-risk groups, said Dr. Larry Fields, the president of the American Academy of Family Physicians.
“Are doctors going to do it? Probably not,” Fields said.
But the recommendations were endorsed by the American Medical Association, which urged physicians to comply.
“This is important public health strategy to stop the spread of HIV,” Dr. Nancy Nielsen, a Buffalo, N.Y.-based physician who sits on the AMA’s governing board, said in a statement.
No consent form needed
Previously, the CDC recommended routine testing for those at high-risk for catching the virus, such as intravenous drug users and gay men, and for hospitals and certain other institutions serving areas where HIV is common. It also recommends testing for all pregnant women.
Under the new guidelines, patients would be tested for HIV as part of a standard battery of tests they receive when they go for urgent or emergency care, or even during a routine physical.
Patients wouldn’t get tested every year: Repeated, annual testing would only be recommended only for those at high-risk.
There would be no consent form specifically for the HIV test; it would be covered in a clinic or hospital’s standard care consent form. Patients would be allowed to decline the testing.
CDC officials have been working on revised recommendations for about three years, and sought input from more than 100 organizations, including doctors’ associations and HIV patient advocacy groups. The CDC presented planned revisions at a scientific conference in February.
Since then, the CDC has strengthened language on informed consent to make sure that no one is tested without their knowledge, and emphasized the need for doctors to provide information on HIV tests and the meaning of positive and negative results.
© 2006 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. |
|
|
| define sex |
[Sep. 20th, 2006|01:51 pm] |
in preparation for an activity with my new kids, i've been scouring dictionaries for an inclusive definition of sex and sexuality. unable to find anything satisfying, i turn to you, dear readers.
How do you define "sex"?
How do you define "sexuality"?
i appreciate your participation. |
|
|
| shoot 'em up |
[Sep. 18th, 2006|02:40 pm] |
My baby sister is going to college. She has her extra long twin sheets, mini refridgerator, and a little something extra. My baby sister has the HPV vaccine.
More specifically, she has the first shot in a series of three that protects against four strands of the human papilloma virus. Similar to the Hep B vaccine, the vaccination is provided in three doses - the second two months after the first and the third six months after the first.
The vaccine, Gardasil, appears to be 100% effective against HPV-16 and HPV-18, the strains that account for 70% of cervical cancers. It is almost as effective with HPV-6 and HPV-11 which cause 90% of genital warts.
The vaccine is approved for women and girls between the ages of 9 and 26. Clinical trials are underway to examine effectiveness with boys and men.
So, what about women over the age of 26? Since HPV is so widespread, is it assumed that those over 26 have been exposed? What about the women over 26 who have managed to avoid exposure through abstinence, safer sex, and luck?
And what of the women who have been exposed to one, but not all four types of HPV the vaccine offers protection against? Say you've had abnormal paps, but not warts, shouldn't you have access to the vaccine to prevent warts in the future, not to mention further abnormal paps from the other strain(s) of HPV?
Now that the vaccine is available, is there access? I know my sister was able to get the hook up in rich white suburbia but what about lower income neighborhoods? Will insurance and medicaid subsidize? Will it be available for free or on the cheap with other vaccinations? Can I ethically advocate vaccination to my teenagers in the Bronx, knowing that the series of shots cost $360?
So many questions. I suppose we will see.
http://www.webmd.com/content/article/123/115099.htm
http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/STDFact-HPV-vaccine.htm#hpvvac2 |
|
|
| the before |
[Aug. 29th, 2006|12:04 am] |
|
So I’m at that moment just before everything comes together. You know, the one where you’re ready to shoot yourself. So stressed out right now. I have four days to find an apartment. Then I fly home on Thursday, pack up my house on Friday, and drive back to New York, friend and Sandy aboard, on Saturday. Somehow I’ve managed to avoid a full blown panic attack, knock wood. My leg won’t stop shaking (it has always shook but now it really is constant) and I have ouchy bumps on my fingertips. Not to mention all the stress pimples. I am quite the pretty picture right now. Think of this as the “before”. Before the apartment is found, before the move, before the official letter of employment, before the job starts. The after will be beautiful. |
|
|
| good news |
[Aug. 24th, 2006|06:32 pm] |
So much good news.
First and most importantly, I had my last day of work. Retired once again. My next day of labor will be in new york in september.
The big news is that the emergency contraception pills Plan B have been FDA approved for over-the-counter sale to women over 18. This is a major victory many years in the making. It still raises questions about whether those under 18 should be able to purchase EC without a prescription, as well as should men be able to purchase the product (which could be a non-issue but all the articles i find refer to "women 18 and older" ignoring the possibility that a man might wish to purchase ec for his partner; similar to a woman buying condoms only for emergency situations). http://www.webmd.com/content/article/126/116441.htm
More good news, not specific to today, is the FDA approval of Famvir, a single dose treatment for herpes (earlier this August). A single dose of the medication is administered at the first inkling of an outbreak. Tests show that it reduces the severity and length of outbreaks. As a single-dose it is more cost-effective than other chronic treatments such as valtrex (for my poverty-striken pals living with herpes). The downside is it does not reduce asymptomatic shedding or frequency of outbreaks. http://www.webmd.com/content/Article/126/116186.htm
Let's all do a happy sexual health dance. Boogey oogey oogey... |
|
|
| the triumphant return of the educated slut |
[Aug. 14th, 2006|06:32 pm] |
because everyone's your friend in new york city!
fuck texas, ya'll.
someone just got a job teaching hiv education in new york city ("new york city?!?" "git a rope...")
so i'm breaking my lease and moving back to the glorious city of my youth (you know, the five years prior to this last one).
although i can't promise sexcapades and whoring, i can promise updates of the educational variety as i'll be back in the scene.
sandy and i will be skipping down the glittering diamond-paved streets. |
|
|
| sex work to social work |
[May. 28th, 2006|05:33 pm] |
death of the blue haired waitress
so my hair is now red again (as you may have noted on my last nyc visit). it is also shorter.
and a week ago i waitressed my last shift.
the following morning i started a new job as a residential advisor at a housing shelter for teenagers. the work is intense but rewarding (i hope). the hours are long and overtime is guaranteed. but the pay is close to nothing. consequently, i'm leaving my beautiful apartment in montrose and moving elsewhere.
cha-cha-cha-cha-changes...
so chances are my blogging will slack even more, unless i happen to develop a sex life (outside of work, duh). apologies in advance. wish me luck as i embark. |
|
|
| sleeping with the rapist |
[May. 8th, 2006|09:03 am] |
I originally wrote this piece for an anthology. It was rejected, but it began to snowball the healing process. Please feel free to share. I'd like this one to be heard.
Sleeping with the Rapist
Jane Vincent
And she said don’t (don’t!)
Stop (stop)
Maybe you better go.
Yes she said don’t (don’t)
Stop (stop)
She kept on saying no.
Til she cried, “Don’t stop don’t stop loving, Dan.
You got fifty nine minutes to go.”
from “Don’t Stop Dan” by the Checkers
I lost my virginity to a rapist.
He didn’t rape me. I didn’t know he was a rapist at the time. Later I learned he had raped two acquaintances.
But I still feel guilty. I wonder if my actions that evening enabled the belief of “no means yes”.
At 18 I was sick of being a virgin. I found a guy that was reputed to put out (he was a playa' or whatever is the equivalent of a boy slut). We met with a group at a hookah bar about a week before graduation. He would come in to IHOP and drink coffee until I got off work. We'd drive around dark country roads with the windows down and Led Zepplin blaring. He would make awkward attempts at compliments and gave me a Pink Floyd t-shirt for my birthday. He would do.
An integral part of this decision was the fact that he was going in to the services. The coast guard. Reserves. (This was before the current war torn state, so it really was a joke). I was leaving on a ten day trip to Europe with my parents. By the time I returned, he would be at boot camp. He would not get out of camp until I had already left for college in New York. So, theoretically, I wouldn't have to worry about a relationship or any of that icky dumping-the-guy stuff.
The evening before his coast guard physical, he picked me up from a particularly long shift at IHOP. We got a room at the Comfort Inn. I was convinced everyone knew what we were doing. The only room available was a suite. This meant we got a bottle of cheap champagne and two plastic dixie cups and one of the regionally legendary jacuzzis.
He popped the champagne and drew me a bath. We sat across from each other in the jacuzzi, full of conditioning-shampoo bubbles, and he gave me a foot rub (waitresses of the world sigh in ecstasy). At this point I was ready to just go to sleep.
So we got out of the tub and toweled off. I then walked to the bed with my towel slung over the shower rod. He modestly tucked his towel around his waist and made some comment about me being "wild" and "bold". Um, I walked ten feet in the buff. Really wild, there.
He turned on the TV to some war movie set in Asia so there was karate, ninjas, and guns. We started making out. I went down on him. At the last minute I pulled up, bit his nipple, and asked him to get a condom."What? Oh, man, I don't have any. I didn't want to make any assumptions."
Hello! We are going to a hotel together. Translation: we will be having sex. You are the boy. The boy gets the condoms. (Thankfully, I am now liberated enough to carry around a dozen or so condoms for all my friends at any given time. And condoms do not assume anything. They are a responsible person’s way of preparing for the future, which could possibly include sex or the need for water balloons).
“Never mind,” I rolled over and huffed."In that case, I'm going to sleep." I said and closed my eyes. He spooned against me. After a few minutes he began kissing my neck. And then we were making out. And mutually jacking the other off. And he pulled up. "I'll pull out," he whispered as he pushed his way inside me. So romantic.
I never said yes. I even said no, although I acknowledge it was more the role of the good girl to deny sexual desire and especially sex without condoms then actual opposition. I wanted to have sex but couldn’t give myself permission to consent. I knew how to say no. What I didn’t know was how to say yes.
Later, I was raped. The scenario was strikingly similar to the loss of my virginity — the difference being my consent. At the end of my freshman year I was raped by a date that I trusted. It was actually a third date. I had been so proud of myself for not putting out immediately. I was going to do the three date standard. I really liked the guy and had plans for a relationship.
But I had been diagnosed with mono the day before. He wouldn't let me cancel the date so we went to a bar that didn't card. After one drink I was swinging and flushed. My hair caught on fire (no lie). I was so exhausted that I needed to go home.
He was too cheap for a cab so walked me the fourteen (okay, they were only street) blocks. Then he asked to come to my dorm room for a phone number. I agreed and signed him in. Soon after he was upstairs, I lay down because I was tired and sick. He lay down next to me. We were making out and getting hot and heavy.
I asked him to put on a condom. He didn't have one. Said he never used them. I didn't have one because I was still the girl. I hadn’t learned to carry my own condoms as I still wasn’t entirely comfortable with my sexual appetite. I didn't steal one from a roommate because I didn't want to have sex at that point, I just wanted to sleep. I told him I wouldn't fuck without a condom but he was welcome to stay the night.
I fell asleep after that. I woke up to him fucking me. I didn't really feel much of anything. I dissociated and watched. Couldn’t speak or scream or push or anything. Then I felt his fingers in my ass. He pulled back and pushed his dick inside me. I was in shock. I had never had any sort of anal sex before. I thought I was crying but I could see my face that was completely emotionless. After he came, he fell asleep in my bed beside me.
In the morning we took a shower together and I signed him out of my dorm. I was still in shock. I avoided his calls and emails that lasted the next six weeks.
It was the calls and emails that most shocked me. They now cause me to question whether he knew he had raped me? Did he know my no meant no? Or did he think I was just playing the part of the girl, resisting what she really wants but can’t ask for.
I am not accepting blame for my own rape or the rape of others. I am questioning the knowledge of the rapists. Did they understand the effect of their actions?
Sexologists refer to the use of “no” when sexual intimacy is desired as “token resistance.” Token resistance is a part of our sexual culture. As boys are taught to pursue and girls are taught to resist, each side is endowed with a simple term. We learn the rule early, boys always say “yes”, and girls always say “no”.
Our culture needs a two-pronged approach to sexual communication to prevent rape. First, we need to teach men (and women) to respect no. When either partner says no, sexual activity stops. In the BDSM scene there is the concept of “safe words”. Partners will predesignate a word to mean no or stop. This word is generally something not uttered during sex play, for example: apple. If the word apple is said during sex play, all activity stops immediately. Similarly, another word can be designated for slow down. Going with the fruit theme, we could say banana. When banana is said, the particular activity can be stopped while sex play continues. Armed with an understanding of the meaning of apples and bananas, a couple’s communication skills are miles above the general population that is still entrenched in “no means no except when it means yes”.
The second, and equally important step, is teaching women (and men) how to say yes to their desires and to sex in general. Because, in the current state of romantic scripts, “no” has multiple meanings. Only when we are provided with the tools to articulate our desires, will “no” be used strictly as refusal. No can’t mean just no until we have the ability to say yes. |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.2){kind=small}
seejanerunaway's journal
